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SCP-9604: Nullstellensatz
Author: whenwerewe
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Item #: 9604
Object Class: Cernunnos
Special Containment Procedures: Rooms are not to be empty. To this end, remaining urban centres are to be demolished, with their populations relocated. Where possible, walls should be torn down systematically, giving residents time to escape, but this is often logistically nonviable. In these cases, after the original inhabitants of a building have been extracted, buildings are to be flattened by any means necessary. SCP-9604-A instances are to be terminated, and their tombs immediately destroyed.
Relocated populations are to be situated in open-plan arcologies, constructed to minimise the quantity of enclosed spaces through the use of large communal areas, group dormitories, and anomalous climate control. The aim is for each arcology to house around ten million individuals and consist of no more than five thousand enclosed rooms.
Evacuation of rural regions is beyond the Foundation’s power; aerial and ground assets are to raze low-density settlements without warning. Any communicative individuals, regardless of provenance, are to be welcomed into any arcology they approach. Transportation is not to be provided.
Description: SCP-9604 is the non-existence of empty rooms.
For the purposes of SCP-9604, a room is any space enclosed by traditional building materials,1 of volume greater than two cubic metres, whose enclosure subtends more than 80% of the field of view from its centre of mass. (That is to say, from its centre, looking out, more than 80% of the field of view is obstructed by construction material). Though this definition mostly accords with historic intuitions, it also includes many closets, boxes, cabinets, &c. The presence of an empty doorframe does not prevent a region from being counted as a separate room.
Prior to the eventuation of SCP-9604, many residences contained more rooms than inhabitants. Public spaces were filled with empty rooms. This has ceased to be the case: when a room would otherwise be empty, it is filled by an instance of SCP-9604-A.
SCP-9604-A are individuals whose remains are self-entombing.
Instances are humans, drawn at random from the pool of all possible human beings. They have essentially arbitrary physical features, clothing, possessions, memories, cultural backgrounds, religious inclinations, and languages. These traits can resemble those found on Earth, in principle, but no instance has ever been known to speak an extant language, nor have any two instances spoken the same language2. Instances, when interviewed, describe an enormous variety of life stories, grounded in apparently consistent alternate histories stretching back across centuries or millennia.
When an SCP-9604-A instance expires, a room rapidly sprouts from the ground around it, enclosing its remains. This room will be large enough for several people to comfortably inhabit, and will emerge with little force, so that any individuals caught as the material appears will be unharmed.
Once it is completely formed, SCP-9604 comes into effect. As a result, if the newly-sprouted room is not destroyed or inhabited before it completes, another SCP-9604-A instance appears. This makes it exceptionally difficult to reduce the total number of instances.
Discovery: SCP-9604 came into effect on 13/11/2014. The significance of this date remains unknown. In the immediate aftermath, the population of the planet rapidly increased as SCP-9604-A instances appeared and navigated out of buildings, leaving behind voids to be filled. Some small portion of SCP-9604-A were violent, armed, or both, and deaths began to cause the creation of new rooms.
An immediate Broken Veil scenario was declared, and after realising the nature of the effect, Overwatch Command concluded that SCP-9604-A were replicating exponentially. They elected to use nuclear and eigenweaponry to neutralise the 5003 most populated urban regions on the planet.
The SCP-9604-A population presents a serious threat to Foundation — and, more broadly, human — interests. It is kept in check only by overwhelming force, and has proven tenacious in the face of adversity. However, SCP-9604-A also make up some 5% of the recognised human population within the arcologies, and are valued for their robustness in high-turnover situations and their ease of procurement. Considerable advances have been made in SCP-9604-A cultural and linguistic conditioning over the past ten years, with current instances entering full utilisation with only three months of enhanced instruction. It is expected SCP-9604-A will be a mainstay of the Foundation workforce for the foreseeable future.