翻译之类的啦!

项目描述: 一个不论使用者技巧如何都无法命中的磨损标靶。即使没有命中靶心,使用者依然会如此相信并在接下来的4至110分钟内不断吹嘘其技巧。
回收日期: 09-27-1963
回收地点: 爱尔兰,科克的一个酒吧
目前状态: Site-77的仓库内

项目描述: 一个具有可随意活动的翅膀的家猪外形的小玩具。项目的行为符合其模板生物,唯一例外的是将飞行作为其主要移动手段。
回收日期: 05-10-2001
回收地点: 德克萨斯,休斯顿
目前状态: 收容于Site-18的仓库内。

项目描述: 一条巧克力燕麦棒,当被消耗时似乎会从另一端长出被消耗的部分。
回收日期: 02-17-2015
回收地点: 安大略省,███████
目前状态: 于 Site-██的仓库中。将其压扁,然而并未无效化其异常效应。
笔记:这就是研究员的思考方式,总是想知道更多…接着就碾碎了我的天杀的巧克力棒。 - 特工 █████

项目描述: 一个纸板箱。所有描述项目物理性质的文件会自动移动到箱子中。
回收日期: 01-01-2016
回收地点: 美国,乔治亚洲,████
目前状态: 保存中
补充:保存纯音频文档的尝试导致录音设备移动到箱子中。

项目描述: 一段信息,当被输入任何媒介时(图像,txt,.mp3,蚂蚁基因组(ant genome),AIAD,[被编辑]),会将自己改变成对同一朵紫花的描述/图片。
回收日期: 04-02-2016
回收地点: 被闪电击中后的[被编辑]的数码相机。
目前状态: 收容于异常数据仓库Drive-14。

项目描述: 一张将任何写在其上的文字变成咒骂的纸。
回收日期: 01-24-19██
回收地点: ████████高校
目前状态: 于Site-██仓库的保险箱内。
我@!$#@$@不诅咒这@!$#的东西。我@!$#@$@很@!$#好@!$没@!$#@问题。 ████博士

记录叙述: 一本在草草翻阅过后会强迫读者使用不寻常的、晦涩的同义词沟通的古老词典。周期性同义变化禁止单词的正确定义。
检索场合: 13-02-19██ A.D.
检索场所: 罗马尼亚,阿台侬,██████
现时状况: 储备中
标注: 同我苦干的人类资源在与我交头接耳1时被强迫使用字典。 - M██████博士

项目描述: 一个A VHS Player ████ when described, changes the letters of random words ██ any description █████ it to the Unicode █████████ known as a 'FULL BLOCK' (█). While the ███ Player itself ███ not been observed ██ show any anomalous ███████ aside from this.
回收██: 09-04-2015
回█地点: 巴西,圣保罗
目前状态: 收容于████-18的██中。

项目描述: 一支制式AR-15战斗步枪,当开火时会从枪管中散发异常量的烟雾。
回收日期: 02-17-2015
回收地点: 德国,慕尼黑
目前状态: 储存于特遣队Nu-7的主军械库

项目描述: 一条普通的金鱼(Carassius auratus),基因层面与其同类完全相同。没道理有异常性质。
笔记:Serion博士在没有O5批准的情况下不允许编辑该文档。
项目描述: 一条普通的金鱼(Carassius auratus),偶尔会产生爆炸,随后会自我复原。爆炸威力足以破坏水族箱的玻璃,目前已杀死十人。
回收日期: 02-05-2016
回收地点: 美国,纽约,Serion博士的家
目前状态: 保存于Site-24二级实验室的塑料碗中。每日喂养两次。

项目描述: 一根幼儿用塑料汤匙,尝试挖出所有接近其六(6)米以内的任何人的眼球。
回收日期: ██-██-2016
回收地点: 科罗拉多,████ ███████
目前状态: 储存中
笔记:这汤匙没有锋利或重到足以造成实质伤害,只会造成轻微不适。建议所有人在其周围工作时佩戴护目镜。

项目描述: 一支制式MPK5冲锋枪。当开火时会发出高频声响以模仿武器开火时的声音。
回收日期: 09-18-2012
回收地点: ███ ████,林克伍德2
目前状态: 储存中;等待销毁。

项目描述: 一块2kg的戈贡佐拉芝士,在距其12米存在蓄胡的男性的话会持续以65分贝的音量播放1970年代的迪斯科-放克音乐3
回收日期: 01-01-2000
回收地点: 比利时,安特卫普,迪斯科舞厅AltMod
目前状态: 收容于全女性站点-12

项目描述: 一个空白的肖像画框,尺寸为1.25 m x 0.75 m。任何注视项目的人会看到其自身的肖像画。注视项目超过2分钟将会导致人员死亡。
回收日期: 11-08-1999
回收地点: 意大利,西西里
目前状态: 储存中
 
项目描述: 一个20cm x 20cm x 20cm的木制方块,其投影形似一只普通家猫。
回收日期: 02-03-2016
回收地点: 葡萄牙,里斯本
目前状态:  ████████博士的办公室

项目描述: 一个可以转弯的“机灵鬼”4
回收日期: 01-03-2016
回收地点: 加拿大,多伦多
目前状态: 于国家电视塔楼梯井进行实验
笔记:当前方仍有阶梯时,项目亦可跳过至多1.4m的短间隔。

项目描述: 一个置于一缸营养液中的人类大脑,装配有摄影机及声音合成器。其自称Zargox Quaglofan,一名23世纪的秘密探员,于1976年执行一场阻止昆虫人帝国崛起的时空任务。
回收日期: 09-23-2011
回收地点: Site 136的坑中
目前状态: Head of Records, Site 136
Notes: It appears to be delusional,  but it's a very good file clerk. - Dr. Danger

项目描述: 一根钛制叉勺。所有使用该器具进食的食物会被进食者认为具有其Any food eaten with this utensil will be perceived to be slightly less spicy than the maximum the eater is readily capable of tolerating.  食物没有化学性变化,使用者亦没有观察到生理上的变化,该项目仅影响使用者的感官。
回收日期: 04-16-2016
回收地点: Site 88食堂。
目前状态: 于Site 88标准收容翼的小型物品收容室中。
笔记:更正——它本该在收容室里的,但最后总会在餐厅的餐具架上回收。最好别让我抓到是谁一直在干这事。 - Rachasthani博士

项目描述: 一个马桶。Any animal that comes into contact with the toilet will burst into laughter even if they don't have the vocal cords to do so.
回收日期: 02-12-2005
回收地点: The Site-66 bathroom.
目前状态: Broken after Dr. █████ dropped item during transport to Site-66 Storage Room.

项目描述: A white sock that whenever worn, turns out to be inside out, completely independent from how to sock was actually put on.
回收日期: 01-04-2002
回收地点: Originally in possession of Agent ██████ 
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A brown paper grocery bag. When placed on the head of a human being, the wearer's face cannot be revealed in any way other than removing the bag on their own. Any other attempts will remove the bag, only to reveal another bag underneath, still covering the head of the wearer. Removed copies no longer display anomalous effect. Attempts to cut holes in the bag have failed. Deceased subjects do not seem to trigger anomalous effect in the object.
回收日期: 04-13-2009
回收地点: A ████████ Supermarket location in ██████, ██, in employee break room. 
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A retractable pen with a spring-based clicker. In addition to the two states such a pen would normally have (retracted and extended), there exists a 'third' state where the pen tip appears to retract and extend again; when attempting to write in this third state, the pen will start making a continuous, bass-heavy noise as it makes contact with the writing surface. Disassembly of the pen has revealed no origin as to the source of the sound; the anomalous effect only functions when the pen is completely reassembled. 
回收日期: 08-16-2015
回收地点: ███████████  High School, █████ USA
目前状态: In storage, Site-23

项目描述: A copper fountain in a public space outside [REDACTED]. During the daytime, the fountain does not display any anomalous properties; however, at any point in the night after 22:30 when the fountain is not being observed, all coins at the bottom of the fountain will inexplicably disappear. Inexplicably, this will only occur if there are at least 1945cm3 of water in the fountain.
回收日期: 16-02-20██
回收地点: ██████, Czech Republic
目前状态: Disassembled in a Foundation-owned warehouse.
Notes: The groundskeeper at the location of recovery was aware of the fountain's anomalous property, but didn't report it because 'it made his job easier'. I sympathize, but still, with the length of time he's been exposed to the anomaly, I'd recommend a Class-E amnestic for him. - Agent █████

I'll look into clearing it with the Ethics Committee. And as for the people telling me this should receive full SCP status - it's a fountain that eats your coins. Nothing more. - Dr. Ryken

项目描述: A whiteboard that anything written on it perfectly mirrors itself within 20 minutes.
回收日期: ██-██-19██
回收地点: █████ ███████ School
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A silver wristwatch which, when laid on any surface, will soft boil an egg placed on it. No other anomalous properties recorded.
回收日期: 05-03-20██
回收地点: ██████████, New Mexico.
目前状态: In the possession of Dr. Michael ███████ for personal use.
Notes: This is absolutely useless; however, it does make preparing lunch at work easier as I don't have to wait to use the stove in the kitchen. No, you can't have it, it's mine! - Dr. Michael ███████

项目描述: An open case of 20 tubes of hair gel. Application of the hair gel to the scalp of any primate will cause hair to grow, recede, or change length until the primate's hair resembles a 1980s style mullet.
回收日期: 08-12-2016
回收地点: Basement of █████ Barber Shop, Waxahachie, TX
目前状态: In Site-17 storage.
Notes: Product appears to be mislabeled. All packaging indicates the product will give the user a 1950s pompadour.

项目描述: A large conch seashell, 30 cm in length. When the opening is held to a human ear, a dial tone is produced from within the shell. No method of dialing the item (if such is possible) has yet been determined.
回收日期: 04-05-2012
回收地点: Obtained from the seashore of Mindil Beach, Australia.
目前状态: Functioning as an aquarium decoration in Site-82.

项目描述: A wireless black PlayStation 4 controller that will connect to Nintendo 64 entertainment consoles and nothing else. Tests have shown that all internals of the controller are unmodified and correctly programmed yet there is still no understanding of how N64s receive the signal broadcasted by the controller.
回收日期: 01-24-2016
回收地点: Obtained from a house in █████████, California
目前状态: In storage. Request for transfer to Area 43 break room pending.

项目描述: A mundane hockey puck. Slides across all surfaces it is placed on, with no observable friction.
回收日期: 03-04-2016
回收地点: Surrendered by the ice hockey club of Darwin, Australia.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A coverless book with 50 pages, when opened it will display pages from different parts of different novels and books, there are no set patterns to what pages that appears in it. The pages will randomize again if book is closed and reopened. 
回收日期: ██-██-1988
回收地点: On a bookshelf in a public library located in  ████████, Hong Kong.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A small white dresser. Upper drawer contains different assortment of items each time it is opened, usually consistent with mundane drawer clutter. Any items placed inside are no longer present when the drawer is closed and reopened. The lower drawer similarly shifts contents, but instead is always uniformly filled with a single substance or collection of identical objects; previously observed examples include shale gravel, pine pitch, unmarked gold ingots, 1985 US pennies with identical scratches and surface features, 150 chrome steel objects of uncertain function,  Bing cherries, and crushed woodwind reeds.
回收日期: 10-14-2003
回收地点: ███████, █████, during a raid on a known Marshall, Carter, and Dark warehouse.
目前状态: Low-risk Anomalous Item storage.
Notes: After brief testing, item was determined to be non-hazardous. Request for further testing as a possible disposal for hazardous items is pending.
 
项目描述: A minor infohazard. Anything describing its physical appearance will automatically be redacted.
回收日期: 04-16-2016
回收地点: Reykjavik, Iceland
目前状态: Placed within storage.

项目描述: A karaoke machine. Anyone who talks in the microphone will have their voice changed to that of a Japanese teenage girl, with anything spoken or sung being automatically translated as well. The voice itself varies slightly from person to person.
回收日期: ██-██-2002
回收地点: A nightclub in █████ Prefecture
目前状态: Stationed at Site-32's break room for recreation.

项目描述: A vial of white powder that is capable of causing severe headaches.
回收日期: [REDACTED]
回收地点: Brooklyn, New York
目前状态: Destroyed in incinerator I-22.

项目描述: A self-reviewing notebook. A short piece of criticism will be written after any text written in the book. As well as reviewing fiction for its value as a novel, it appears to be able to fact check both fiction and nonfiction, and will suggest potential improvements.
回收日期: ██-██-████
回收地点: A book of the week club in ██ Spain.
目前状态:  In storage at Site-14. Suggestion for use as an aid to research in anomalous and mainstream studies pending approval.

项目描述: A single feather that appears to be constantly changing in color, the feather's color seems to change approximately every two seconds. When music is played within a 12 meter radius, the feather reacts to this stimuli by changing colors much quicker than normal, much like a strobe light, the speed of which it changes seems to vary depending on the speed, beat, tone, and tempo of the song/music being played.
回收日期: 07-2█-20██
回收地点: Found in what appears to be an old and abandoned club in ██████, Philippines.
目前状态: Kept in storage and used during Christmas parties.

项目描述: A maths textbook whose contents can only be remembered by smoking the pages. Pages regenerate after thirty minutes.
回收日期: 16-7-2010
回收地点: █████ █████, Australia
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A man in his mid-30's, capable of twirling any object on his index finger at extreme speeds, regardless of size, mass, chemical composition, or shape of said object in relation to his own body.
回收日期: 03-06-2012
回收地点: Sunderland, Massachusetts
目前状态: In low-threat humanoid containment, Site-12

项目描述: A 4oz cup of ████ brand applesauce, contents nonperishable. Expiration date always matches current date.
回收日期: 6-18-2016
回收地点: Gold Hill, Oregon
目前状态: Inadvertently consumed by Junior Researcher ██████. ██████ suffered mild indigestion but recovered within 12 hours.

项目描述: A █████████ █████ brand record player. Only plays "What is Love?" by Haddaway, no matter what record is placed in it.
回收日期: 05-25-2011
回收地点: A record store in Kiev, Ukraine
目前状态: In the office of Dr. ███████, at his personal request.
What? I really like the song. - Dr. ███████

项目描述: A goldfish which produces a constant stream of fresh water from its mouth at the rate of 10.9 L/s.
回收日期: 12-10-2016
回收地点: Rhodehampton, New South Wales
目前状态: Forcibly imploded following a blockage in the drainage system for its tank.

项目描述: A 3D jigsaw sphere whose pieces, when disassembled, form two identical copies of the same sphere. Lost pieces of an individual sphere will occasionally be found inside another sphere when disassembling it.
回收日期: 07-03-2016
回收地点: Bowral, New south Wales
目前状态: Initially, three completed puzzles were recovered – the pieces for fifteen more were found inside those spheres. Further testing has resulted in the construction of four additional whole spheres.

项目描述: A blank portrait sized canvas similar in appearance to SCP-1074. Whenever a memetic or info hazardous object is painted on the canvas, it will transfer into the painting. (Yes, even SCP-1074 itself.) 
回收日期: 7-11-2016
回收地点: Augusta, Kansas.
目前状态: Deemed neutralized once SCP-055 was painted onto the canvas. Last seen in a containment locker in Site 17. 
How the hell did someone manage to draw 055 onto this? -Dr. ████

项目描述: A cube constructed of concrete which will produce a sap from the ████ tree every two (2) to four (4) hours. Sap has been tested but has proven to have no anomalous properties. 
回收日期: ██-20-1998
回收地点: [REDACTED], Switzerland
目前状态: In the storage of Area 01 Site 17 with weekly cleaning from Janitorial Crews. Personnel under the security level of two (2) should not be permitted near the object following the near destruction of the object by Dr. James Write.
Note: I'm surprised that the sap has no anomalous properties. I mean, where does it come from? How is the sap made? Maybe it's a hidden form of teleportation! - Dr. Houston

项目描述: A Mac-Book that when any video is played using the device will redirect to a video of Rick Astley's Never Gonna Give You Up.
回收日期: ██-██-200█
回收地点: █████, Arizona
目前状态: Undergoing maintenance after unknown damaging of screen. 
Did this computer just rick roll me? - Dr. Animus

项目描述: A D20 die that will never land on anything greater than 5.
回收日期: ██-██-2016
回收地点: ██████ D.N.D. club
目前状态: In Site-██'s storage closet

项目描述: A signed picture of Ethan Klein from the YouTube channel "h3h3Productions", that causes the viewer to cough until it is taken out of their line of sight.
回收日期: ██-██-2016
回收地点: In the personal collection of the deceased ██████ ████
目前状态: In a low-value containment locker at Site-37.
Site personnel are not to place bets on how long they can look at this item for. Also, whoever found this, keep it up, proud of you. - Site Director Levy

项目描述: A Standard Computer Keyboard, Connected By A USB Cord. When The Peripheral Is Connected To Any Computer, It Automatically Capitalizes All Words Typed By It. There Are No Apparent Restrictions To This Effect.
回收日期: 11-09-2016
回收地点: ████ ███████, Ohio, USA
目前状态: Connected To The PC Of Dr. ███████
Note: I Don't Mind Typing Like This. It's Pretty Fun To @!$# People Off With It. - Dr. ███████

项目描述: A Northern Mockingbird (Mimus polyglottus) that can imitate any human phrase spoken to it. However, it always repeats these phrases in German, regardless of what language they were initially spoken in.
回收日期: 11-14-2016
回收地点: [REDACTED], North Carolina
目前状态: In a low-security animal containment unit at Site-65

项目描述: A combat knife with a serrated blade and a wooden handle. whenever this knife is used with the intention of harm the knife blade will disappear through unknown means. This event is un-observable and happens instantaneously. When in this anomalous state any person(s) "stabbed" with the knife will instantaneously and unavoidably whisper the phrase "I'm dead" and lie down. After about 4 minutes the victim will reawaken unharmed with no recollection of the event.
回收日期: 05-09-2016
回收地点: ██████████, ███
目前状态: Secured in Site-78's non-sentient storage wing
Note: When we found this █████ wouldn't stop stabbing me with it. Couldn't stop the bastard either. - ████████ from Recovery Team ███

项目描述: A purple and black mechanical pencil. Examination shows no brand names or logos anywhere on the surface of the object. When the top of the mechanical pencil is pushed down it reveals standard pencil lead. Testing reveals that although the pencil only seems to have 10 cm of this lead every time the top is pushed down more appears instantaneously. Any attempts to remove the pencil lead from the object have resulted in failure.
回收日期: 07-05-2007
回收地点: █████████ Secondary School. █████████, ███████
目前状态: In possession of Assistant Researcher ███████. Lost.

Item Description: An empty USB flash drive. Describing the object in question on any electronic program will cause each  word in the document to redirect to a seemingly random YouTube video. If the name of an existing YouTube user is mentioned within the document, it will link to one of their videos (Example: "PewDiePie").
Date of Recovery: 19-06-2002
Location of Recovery: Connected to the computer of Foundation containment specialist ██████
Current status: [REDACTED].

项目描述:  A 36 year old Caucasian male who constantly demands physical contact with human beings, despite being completely inside-out. He doesn't show the need to breathe, eat, drink or excrete waste matter. A translucent secretion covers his body which causes all homo sapiens who come into contact with it to explode violently in a matter of seconds.
回收日期: 12-25-2008
回收地点: Found wandering the streets in Los Angeles, California
目前状态: Contained in a sealed chamber in Site-88's sentient anomaly wing.
Note: Under no circumstances are personnel to use the secreted goo for pranks or practical jokes. Remember the golden rule, you wouldn't want someone to make you explode with shiny goo from a strange inside-out man. - Dr. Blackbox

项目描述: A 3 liter sample of freshwater in a standard soda bottle that does not change its physical state regardless of temperature.
回收日期: 11-25-2014
回收地点: ██████ office building in ███████, Florida.
目前状态: In storage at Site-███.

项目描述: A volcano-shaped cake that erupts approximately every 30 days with either red, luminescent icing or 1500 degrees centigrade lava. The cake is both immune to this lava and doesn't go stale. The item has no place to store either of the liquids it erupts
回收日期: 04-13-2007
回收地点: A Pompeiian bakery.
目前状态: Held in Site-██ Cafeteria cold-storage Went into dormancy after being exposed to continual cold-storage temperatures. Currently in heated room to attempt to 'revive' the item.
 
项目描述: A monarch butterfly (Danaus plexippus) approximately 7.5x smaller than average members of its species (measured 5 millimeters in wingspan)
回收日期: 03-13-2016
回收地点: ████████, Mexico
目前状态: Contained within a terrarium in Site-66 Deceased as of 07-25-2016

项目描述: A Heckler & Koch HK416 D10RS carbine. When the fire selector is set to a setting other than "Safe", any lifeform who comes in contact with the weapon will spontaneously hear the song "Shoot to Thrill" by the band AC/DC playing on a loop for as long as they remain in contact.
回收日期: 04-11-2016
回收地点: ██████ gun show, Texas, United States
目前状态: In storage at Site-19. Available at request for firing range usage.

项目描述: A name tag with the name "Steve" written on the front. Upon placing the name tag on a person's chest, the person will claim that their name has always been Steve, regardless of gender.
回收日期: 08-16-2016
回收地点: ██████ CO, United States
目前状态: In storage at Site-17

项目描述: An Armenian style crucifix that emits high pitched squeals by unknown means when exposed to poultry products.
回收日期: 04-17-19██
回收地点: ██████, Armenia
目前状态: In a safe located at Site-19.

项目描述: A chess set made from English Oak.  When the pieces are moved on the board they generate specific sounds audible only to the players. Moving a piece creates sounds similar to clanging metal or galloping horses, while removing a piece from play generates sounds of punching or clashing metal. At the end of a game a trumpet fanfare will play for 3 seconds.
回收日期: 13-02-1992
回收地点: ████ █████ ███ █████ Primary School, Serbia
目前状态: In the Area 53 break room.

项目描述: An apple tree whose fruit has been described as abnormally delicious. Any human who consumes a fruit from the tree will be propelled south by southeast away from ██°██'██.█"N ██°██'██.█"E at 87 kph.
回收日期: 05-08-2012
回收地点: Mt. Ararat, Turkey
目前状态: Relocated to Site-██'s arboretum.

项目描述: A standard bathroom mirror. Any reflections of humans it casts appear to stare at the subject in shock or horror, regardless of actions performed while reflected. Only eye movement is asynchronous with subject movement.
回收日期: 14-11-2015
回收地点: London, Britain
目前状态: In storage at Site-██

项目描述: A wooden door, painted white. At exactly 11:30 PM local time, a knock is heard from the side not being observed. If both sides are observed, knocks will emanate from both sides simultaneously.
回收日期: 14-11-2015
回收地点: London, Britain.
目前状态: In storage at Site-██

项目描述: A standard kitchen sink. Humans over the age of 21 with at least one child under the age of 16 consistently sees it as full of dirty dishes, regardless of its current state. Humans under the age of 18 see it as completely empty, again regardless of current state.
回收日期: 14-11-2015
回收地点: London, Britain
目前状态: In storage at Site-██

项目描述: A red plastic ████ brand hockey stick that, when used to simulate the act of playing a guitar, will cause the song "Through The Fire and Flames" by the rock band Dragonforce to play. The sound appears to emerge from the stick. The music will stop if the song is played to the end or if the individual using it stops simulating guitar playing.
回收日期: 15-12-2009
回收地点: ███████, Kentucky
目前状态: In storage at Site-50

项目描述: 10 instances of A4 sized standard 70 gram HVS paper. When flipped, the paper would always be empty regardless of tools or substances used, including oil paint, oil, permanent marker, water paint, pencil, fountain pen, ballpoint pen, garlic and similar thermal-sensitive ink, tomato, blood, and ultraviolet ink. No sign of previous inscription remained after the paper was flipped. Torn instances show no apparent anomaly.
回收日期: 02-10-2016
回收地点: Medan, Indonesia.
目前状态: In storage at Site-42.

项目描述: A candle that never melts while lit. Instead of melting, the candle randomly changes its scent every 5 minutes. 
回收日期: 12-01-2016
回收地点: Alaska. 
目前状态: In storage for use as a holiday meal centerpiece.

项目描述: A photograph of a ██████. In spite of no evidence for its existence being present, it will cause those who talk about it to insist upon its existence. Contents of the photograph are debated.
回收日期: Unknown 
回收地点: Unknown
目前状态: Unknown; existence of object debated. Staff frequently report that the photo is hung in ███████████'s office.

项目描述: A wooden chair that, when sat in by a homo sapiens in front of a desk, will cause the aforementioned homo sapiens to say in their native language that they are "very busy". Primates will vocalize in English.
回收日期: 02-17-2011
回收地点: Memphis, Tennessee.
目前状态: In Storage In Dr. ███████'s office.

项目描述: 32 sheets of paper that will animate drawings upon them for 15 seconds after being drawn. Animated drawings do not exhibit awareness of the three dimensional area around them.
回收日期: 09-26-2015 
回收地点: A FedEx Office Print & Ship Center in Plymouth, Minnesota.
目前状态: Site-42's recreational room.

项目描述: A picture that changes based on the current holiday. On non-holidays, it is a picture of a Siamese cat. An unidentified male voice gives the appropriate greeting for the holiday to anyone who looks at the picture. 
回收日期: 01-01-2010
回收地点: A house in London. 
目前状态: Hung on a wall in Site-19's main lobby. 

项目描述: A sculpture of Santa that says "Ho-ho-ho" to anyone who goes near it at night. It also yells out the last naughty act of anyone on the naughty list who goes near it. 
回收日期: 12-24-2015
回收地点: A house in California. 
目前状态: On the fireplace in Site-19's main lounge.

项目描述: A set of candy canes which regenerate when consumed, and causes any kid who consumes one to be exceptionally nice for 30 days. Subsequent consumptions renew this period of niceness.
回收日期: 12-01-200█.
回收地点: A candy store in ███████, California. 
目前状态: In Site-██'s Cafeteria for snacks. 
If we could take our kids to work, they would enjoy these. -Agent ██████.

项目描述: An ornate compass. Regardless of magnetic interference or any other variables, the object's needle will always point towards the location of a woman named ████████ █████.
回收日期: ██-██-2014
回收地点: Perugia, Italy
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A juicy blender made by █████ Inc. All comments about its juiciness will be altered immediately after writing to mention how juicy it is at regular intervals, sometimes adding text to accommodate the object's juicy properties that was not originally written. All added text about the juicy blender will be in the style of the original writing, although text will not be added if there is not enough space.
回收日期: 07-17-2010
回收地点: Kansas City, KS, USA
目前状态: In storage to properly contain the object's juiciness.
Notes: █████ Inc. denies creation of the juicy object. Investigation into the matter revealed that the effect transferred to all blenders created by █████ Inc. other than the juicy one for exactly one minute beginning at 8:29 CST, on 07-03-2010. █████ Inc. is to be monitored by the Foundation for further anomalous activity, although one of their blenders is juicy.

项目描述: A pile of dirt in a pot that contain the remains of a moth orchid (Phalaenopsis).
回收日期: 12-23-2016
回收地点: Minot, ND, USA
目前状态: In the botanical storage facility of Site-██ In storage.
Notes: All text about it will alter itself immediately after it is not observed by any human or humanoid. These alterations will override the last section of text on the documentation to include a description of the item's anomalous properties. If there is already a section of text describing them, it will simply be moved, still overriding the last section. Object's properties appear to stay even after the plant itself died of natural causes. - Dr. Morpho

项目描述: A collection of 20 "bath bombs" that are space themed, subjects that go in water affected by the bath bombs claim to be in space on a "mission to save earth from the evil space alien Zargop".
回收日期: 11-16-2016
回收地点: [REDACTED], USA
目前状态: In Storage Site-156, chemical testing begins on █████.

项目描述: A steam iron. When used, clothing being ironed will emit a loud scream as long as direct contact with the iron is kept.
回收日期: 01-03-2017
回收地点: Washington, England
目前状态: In Storage at Site-17.

项目描述: A dog1.jpg. When directly described in any digital text format, the description will immediately be replaced with a JPEG image of dog2.jpg, varying in appearance and quality.
回收日期: 19-01-2017
回收地点: The house of the █████ family, Sunderland, England.
目前状态: Low-security animal containment unit at Site-17.
Note: Her name is Elsie. - Dr. Weppler

项目描述: A yellow stress ball that, when looked at or held for any period of time longer than two minutes, will result in the subject suffering a heart attack and expiring.
回收日期: 12-10-2016
回收地点: Agent Ross's office desk at Site-12
目前状态: In storage at Site-12's High-Security Visual Hazard Ward.

项目描述: A dog of indeterminate appearance that can only been seen and interacted with by people who do not have any living pets. The dog's appearance, size and breed changes between viewings, although all subjects universally agree on its physical location.
回收日期: 13-09-2016
回收地点: RSPCA shelter in Rhodehampton, Australia
目前状态: Neutralized after adoption by Dr. Ellis.

项目描述: A purple leather bandanna that, when worn, makes the wearer absolutely obedient of those in higher authority than themselves. 
回收日期: 09-26-████
回收地点: Tegucigalpa, Honduras.
目前状态: -In Site 15 storage In Director █████'s office.

项目描述: A pair of dumbbells with no label telling the exact weight. When used, users will report that it is the perfect weight for physical exercise.
回收日期: 07-13-████
回收地点: Anytime Fitness Center, Madison, Wisconsin.
目前状态: In Site-15's break room.

项目描述: A piece of white printer paper with a realistic drawing of an unknown species of mushroom. When making direct visual contact with the paper, subjects have vivid hallucinations, as well as increased levels of dopamine.
回收日期: ██-██-2018
回收地点: █████████, CA, USA
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A █████-brand roll of household toilet paper which, instead of getting less after usage, increases its overall length after 6 hours by 5.15% of it's total mass.
回收日期: ██-07-1992
回收地点: █████████, Germany
目前状态: Used in Site 15 bathroom near break room.

项目描述: A fluorescent orange plastic vuvuzela that, when played, renders the user invisible to the naked eye or cameras.
回收日期: 05-06-2010
回收地点: Johannesburg, South Africa
目前状态: In Safe-level storage. Missing. In storage.
Notes: Don't be stupid. We might not see you, but we sure can hear you. - Site 17 Security

项目描述: A small tire track eel (Mastacembelus Armatus) that can float through the air and somehow does not require respiration.
回收日期: 07-01-20██
回收地点: A pet shop in Burlingame, California.
目前状态: In biological storage in Site-██. Original object died of natural causes, anomalous properties did not remain. Object's offspring exhibited the same anomalous properties of the original object after maturing. Remaining subjects kept in biological storage in Site-███.

项目描述: A ████ █-███ Pickup Truck. When any person who attempts to enter or climb onto the bed of the truck without permission of the owner (typically the current driver), they will be unable to do so, even if assisted through external means.
回收日期: ██-██-2013
回收地点: ████████ City, Philippines
目前状态: Being used by Agent R████████.
Notes: It's useful. Too many damn kids have tried to hitch a ride on my truck before. - Agent R████████

项目描述: A Boeing 767-12ER aircraft that took off from PHX Sky Harbor Airport in Phoenix Arizona on 12-11-1990. Once airborne, the plane climbed to an altitude of 1200 feet before suddenly stopping in mid-air. It is suspected that all inside the plane suffered the the same effect as passings by other aircraft have shown people but no movement or sound.
回收日期: 12-12-90
回收地点: 4233 Meters south-west of Phoenix, Arizona.
目前状态: Shot down under direct order of Site-12's Director, Dr. Lang, on 11-03-15. No anomalous effects remain in the pocket of air where the air plane had been and the plane's wreckage shows no anomalous effects whatsoever.  The plane's wreckage is currently stored at Site-12's Non-Anomalous Storage Lab.

The corpse of █████ R. ████, a former filing assistant for the Foundation who was KIB on 06-07-2017. Any text about the object will be altered immediately after writing to be more organized, often to an inflated or unnecessary degree.

项目描述: A waterborne neurological disease with minor symptoms. Infected hosts become very polite, neat, and develop a liking for bow ties. Disease is easily fought off by immune system.
回收日期: 06-04-████
回收地点: Several cities in Lithuania.
目前状态: Samples in storage.

项目描述: A wallet that, when closed, automatically empties whatever is inside.
回收日期: ██-██-████
回收地点: Raleigh, North Carolina
目前状态: Incinerated.
Notes: Can't believe I lost twenty bucks to this @!$#@$@!, glad it was incinerated. - Dr. Joseph

项目描述: An █████ brand controller that compels the user to throw it after dying in any game.
回收日期: 06-15-████
回收地点: New Jersey ████ Gaming Convention
目前状态: In Site-14 storage. Currently searching for other specimens.

项目描述: A bag of ██████ brand chocolate morsels. Eating more than one piece at a time results in the chocolate tasting strongly of human fecal matter.
回收日期: 07-02-2013
回收地点: █████ ███ ████ Bakery in Allentown, New York
目前状态: In Site-53 cold storage.

项目描述: A horror movie poster that changes to another horror movie poster every night. Anyone who looks at it gets nightmares and eventually gets too tired to do anything. 
回收日期: 10-10-2010. 
回收地点: Hollywood. 
目前状态: Incinerated.

项目描述: A red ballpoint pen that has magnetic properties despite being made of non-magnetic materials.
回收日期: 01-19-████
回收地点: ███████████ Middle School
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: An oven that "bakes" people
回收日期: ██-██-████
回收地点: ████████ School of █████ ███████
目前状态: Site-19, being used as a replacement for SCP-420-J
Notes: This is the best ████ in the world, man -Dr ██████

项目描述: A black ballpoint pen that writes down the opposite of what the user is trying to write.
回收日期: ██-██-20██
回收地点: The office of Dr. Keyser.
目前状态: Located in the office of Dr. Keyser.
Notes: I think I'll keep this when I retire. - Dr. Keyser

项目描述: A female specimen of Gallus gallus domesticus, the domesticated hen. Eggs produced by it do not contain yolk or amniotic fluids, but are instead filled with a random common cooking ingredient, such as milk, flour, or chocolate. Immediately after oviposition, the item will breach the shell and consume the contents of the egg if not prevented from doing so.
回收日期: 01-07-2017
回收地点: Thornton, Colorado.
目前状态: Contained in the aviary of Site-24.

项目描述: A packet of cat food that tastes like dog food
回收日期: ██-██-20██
回收地点: Low-security animal containment unit at Site-17
目前状态: Incinerated
Are you sure it wasn't just dog food in the wrong can? - Dr. Michaels
Yes, I'm sure. - Dr. Stevens, Head of low-security animal containment site
Question: who tastes this @!$#? - Dr. Jorge
I do. -Dr. Stevens, Head of low-security animal containment site

项目描述: A campfire that flares up whenever an animal sneezes within eight meters of it.
回收日期: 06-16-2017
回收地点: ██████████ National Park
目前状态: Extinguished. Remains showed no anomalous properties.

项目描述: A white plastic salt shaker. The object has the ability to instantaneously melt all snow within a 55-meter radius of it.
回收日期: 01-13-2017
回收地点: A █████'s restaurant building in █████████████, Ohio
目前状态: Being used for snow clearing at Site-██
Note: Try not to bring this near SCP-804 while you're at it.

项目描述: A creature of the genus Apis (Honey bee) that can remove any substance of color.
回收日期: 01-13-2017
回收地点: Knoxville, Tennessee
目前状态: Kept in low-security animal containment site

项目描述: A █████████ brand plasma screen television. The television is unable to play any form of animation that can be referred to as "Anime," a Japanese style of animation. Instead of anime playing, "ANIME WAS A MISTAKE" in large red letters is portrayed on a black background.
回收日期: 04-11-2016
回收地点: Augusta, Kansas
目前状态:  In storage.

项目描述: A living Yarn Yoshi doll.
回收日期: 01-10-2017
回收地点: The house of the ████████ family.
目前状态: Pending use.
"It's the cutest thing ever! Why would we take it away from them?" - Dr. Betancourt

项目描述: A heart-shaped Valentine's Day card that appears to throb like a real human heart. Anyone who watches it gets a better understanding of the concept of love.
回收日期: 02-14-2010
回收地点: A house in Seattle, Washington.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A small brown glass bottle, with approximately 250 ml of unknown hallucinogenic liquid inside. The item has a faded label made from paper, Liquid has been described as being clear, odorless and tasteless. Liquid is of an unknown chemical composition, not matching any known pure elements.  
回收日期:  ██-██-████ 
Location of Recovery: The lab of Dr. ███████████ and Dr. █████ in the country  ████████ 
目前状态: In dark, cold storage unit at Site-███

项目描述: A headpiece accessory for a costume resembling a set of bull horns. When worn, the subject feels unreasonably furious against red objects and tries to charge into them.
回收日期: 06-05-199█
回收地点: A costume shop in ███████, Spain.
目前状态: In storage. Investigating if it is actually a piece of a bigger costume.
Note: Why the @#! have we got red walls?! Seriously! - Agent ███████

项目描述: I Poodle. I have brown hair. When I talk about me, I talk in first-person perspective. I also talk in weird voice.
回收日期: 04-21-201█
回收地点: I found in pet shop in [REDACTED], Hong Kong.
目前状态: I live in Site 45. I no like.
Note: Cat keep going away. I no like.

项目描述: A one dollar bill (US currency) that, upon insertion into a vending machine, will dispense the item that is chosen, then return to the owner, as if it was never accepted.
回收日期: ██-██-20██
回收地点: Unknown as to its original discovery. It was found to exist by Dr. [REDACTED], while inserting the bill into a drinks vending machine in [REDACTED], Wisconsin.
目前状态: In possession of Dr. ███████. He is testing its other anomalous effects, including the occurrences of sold-out items and items costing more than $1 US.
Note: This bill is not to be used to pay for items, and should be A) kept out of wallets, and B) marked with an SCP logo, to eliminate confusion.

项目描述: A 17x17x20 cm birdhouse. Any non-avian animal coming into contact with it is immediately launched into the stratosphere at a velocity of 3 km/s.
回收日期: 01-23-2017
回收地点: Toronto, Canada
目前状态: Incinerated.

项目描述: The ashes of the the previous AO. Presumably, any non-avian animal coming into contact with it is immediately launched into the ground at a velocity of 3 km/s.
回收日期: 01-27-2017
回收地点: Canadian Outpost-03
目前状态: Dispersed and neutralized on impact.
Note: Significant structural damage to Candian Outpost-03 has been sustained. Researchers Barrow, Smithson (the handler), and Zurrey expired. Cover story of a military ordnance failure disseminated.

项目描述: Two lightswitches connected to a single circuit. When in use, any human who interacts with the object will select the switch opposite of the one they intend to.
回收日期: 04-13-2013
回收地点: Apartment 12-A, Hoosegow Developments, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
目前状态: Installed in Researcher Smith's office on request.

项目描述: An inanimate empty space in the approximate shape of a baggy shirt, wide trousers, and a long cape. When a human walks into the space from behind, it will move and act as worn clothing. Despite being perceived as intangible and transparent, subjects are incapable of recalling details of anything that would normally be obscured by clothing of the same shape.
回收日期: 02-09-1967
回收地点: On top of Hadrian's Wall near Whitby, Yorkshire
目前状态: Mannequin in Site-45's Anomalous Clothing Storage.

项目描述: A bag of █████ brand chips that duplicates every 7 hours. Duplications exhibit this property.
回收日期: 04-16-2███
回收地点: Site-██ Canteen
目前状态: Used as snacks in Site-██.

项目描述: A water fountain located in Gilbert Arizona. When an American coin of any value is thrown in and the user makes a wish, said wish will come true exactly 24 hours later. (Effect will only happen if the user does not say what wish is within the timespan leading up to it coming true)
回收日期: 11-12-2014
回收地点: Gilbert, Arizona
目前状态: Located in Dr. Lang's office at Site-12.

项目描述: An empty bottle of █████ brand soda that will cause any liquid poured out of it to instantly relocate to the users stomach. Liquids pass through the users digestive system non-anomalously.
回收日期: 03-10-2015
回收地点: Soda Factory in Waco, Texas
目前状态: In the cupboard of Dr. █████'s office at Site-44.
Note: You can't even taste the soda you're trying to drink. You're getting all of the sugar and none of the flavor. Talk about a lose-lose. -Dr. █████

项目描述: A patch of skin formerly present on the left calf of an adult Caucasian male. A tattoo is present on the object that reads "Mr. Just Has The Tattoo, by Gamers Against Weed". This tattoo has resisted all attempts at removal. Skin was removed during a grafting procedure. Previous owner has assumed a completely new identity since the procedure and claims to have no memory of his time with the tattoo.
回收日期: 05-02-2016
回收地点: Richmond, Virginia
目前状态: In cryogenic storage.
Note: The tattoo's previous owner possessed a list similar to other "Misters Against Weed". The document is included below. Additionally, while the tattoo was still present on its owner, the subject claimed to have no memory of receiving the tattoo and that it had been present since birth.

项目描述: Cool.
回收日期: 09-02-2017
回收地点: Retrieved during a raid on a known anartist exhibition in Sydney, Australia.
目前状态: Not.

项目描述: It is not a shape that does not make any mention of it opposite. It doesn't do that.
回收日期: 03-06-2012
回收地点: Definitely not ████████, ████████.
目前状态: I can guarantee it isn't located in Site-██'s Low Value Containment Area.

项目描述: Two physically non-anomalous humans Arin Hanson and Dan Avidan. Any content uploaded by either of them onto the internet will immediately receive approximately 200-300 of what the platform's way of sharing or enjoying something is, such as "likes" on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr and YouTube. This will occur despite the page they uploaded not being viewed by anything.
回收日期: 05-26-2015
回收地点: Twitter; the anomaly was discovered by Web crawler XIO-177 and was automatically marked as an anomaly.
目前状态: Currently hosting several popular internet web-series. No online comments regarding the anomaly have been noted since discovery.

项目描述: A lunchroom vending machine that dispenses golden and silver dollars as change, despite no coins being present within the machine.
回收日期: 02-03-2017
回收地点: █████ ██████████ High School, █████ ██████████, Rhode Island
目前状态: Kept in Site-██'s cafeteria Kept in storage.
Note: Under no circumstances are personnel to use the vending machine. I understand that these coins are worth more than what the machine values them as, but that is no excuse for a get-rich-quick scheme. - Dr. █████

项目描述: A pack of 19 hot dogs of the ███████ Company that, when eaten, produces a scream described by research staff as "agonized", despite no sound producing apparatus being present in the hot dogs
回收日期: 09-07-2014
回收地点: Site-███ staff barbecue
目前状态: In cold storage. 
Note: Aside from the screams these were some pretty damn good hot dogs. - Agent ████

项目描述:  A class III (Low Threat) concept, in which personnel infected believe they have "level 6 clearance" and are capable of accessing every file in the database. The concept is spread through specific software malfunctions that can occur within the database.
回收日期: 01-27-2010
回收地点: Site-551.
目前状态: The malfunctions that are capable of spreading the concept have been fixed. A single terminal that still carry the malfunctions is kept at Site-49 for study.

项目描述: An unshuffleable deck of 52 playing cards. Any card taken 'at random' from the deck will reveal itself to be the 3 of hearts, regardless of where in the deck it was originally situated.
回收日期: ██-██-2015
回收地点: ████████, England
目前状态: Held in low-value item storage at Site-32.

项目描述: A self replenishing dirty clothes bin. Individuals who notice its presence will feel the urge to wash said clothes as to empty the bin, to no effect.
回收日期: 12-12-2011
回收地点: Auckland, New Zealand
目前状态: Foundation humanitarian help facility in Central Africa; used to provide clothing to local population.

项目描述: A standard, unmarked white cotton glove which has a uniform colour gradient across its entire surface, devoid completely of any shadows, as well as a large black outline across its edge regardless of viewing angle. These effects lead to it appearing to have a "cartoon" style. 
回收日期: 07-11-14
回收地点: ████████████, Florida
目前状态: In the office of Dr. ██████.

项目描述: A set of curtains that, when hung over a bedroom window, will prevent anybody within the bedroom from entering a state of sleep before 01:30 AM and after 09:00 AM, regardless of local time.
回收日期: 11-04-2002
回收地点: Seoul, South Korea
目前状态: Hung over a window in the observation room of SCP-████ after too many reports of personnel falling asleep.

项目描述: An alarm clock that will say the phrase "Stop ignoring me" in an unidentified male voice at 3:57 AM every night. Effect occurs regardless of whether the object is powered.
回收日期: 5-18-2005
回收地点: Apartment complex in Atlanta, Georgia
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: An adult size Spider-Man Costume. Memories involving direct visual exposure to the object cannot be forgotten and will override existing memories after prolonged exposure.
回收日期: 11-13-07
回收地点: Nashville, Tennessee
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A sheet of white paper with the word "bimonthly" written on it in black marker. When viewed by two or more people, an argument will begin between the viewers as to whether the word means "twice a month" or "once every two months". This argument may escalate into violence without intervention. This effect persists even when subjects are told not to argue over the definition of the word.
回收日期: 02-11-1994
回收地点: Wicklow, Ireland
目前状态: Destroyed in a particularly heated debate between two senior researchers. Both have been reprimanded.

项目描述: A fractured skull of Felis catus or common house cat. The skull secretes a dark black liquid similar in composition to blood though the makeup is mostly unknown. Upon a person touching the liquid with exposed skin they will experience intense distrust and paranoia of cats or cat-like objects for four to seven hours. When questioned, all infected individuals beg to "make them all stop talking."
回收日期: 09-09-1992
回收地点: Mr. J██████'s High School Biology classroom in Ithaca, ███ ███
目前状态: Contained in cold storage. Cleaned weekly.

项目描述: A box set for the first season of the American situational comedy "Seinfeld". When viewed for more than 15 minutes, viewers will say nothing except observation based stand-up comedy. Effect has been shown to last in excess of 100 minutes.
回收日期: 02-05-2011
回收地点: ███████████, Illinois
目前状态: In Site-34 low security item storage.

项目描述: A visual cognitohazard affecting approximately 20% of sapient viewers. Object compels the viewer to seek and consume the nearest unopened slice of American cheese.
回收日期: 03-18-2013
回收地点: Sydney, Austrailia
目前状态: In storage. Cheese kept on-site in the event of accidental exposure.

项目描述: A 335 ml glass cup that causes waitstaff of any location to compulsively fill it to the brim.
回收日期:3-29-2016
回收地点: █████████ ████, Atlanta, Georgia
目前状态: Broken after staff in kitchen raced to fill it up.
Notes: Remnants reformed into bowl on orders of Dr. ███████, effects remain.

项目描述: A ██████ brand laptop with no signs of wear. Battery is included but no other accessories have been found. All male humans of Caucasian descent exposed to the object report an inability to perceive color displayed in its screen.
回收日期:12-██-20██
回收地点: Raid of GoI-███ base in ██████, Brunei Darussalam.
目前状态: In low-security item storage.

项目描述: A school notebook that, when opened by an individual, will teleport said individual to Site-██ under all circumstances.     
回收日期: 2-█-201█
回收地点: ██████ Middle School
目前状态: Incinerated 
Note: Son of a bitch, whose idea was it to store the damn notebook near the fireplace of the Site-██ lounge!? Fire and paper doesn't do good, so if there is another magical notebook, don't put it near a goddamn fire! - Researcher █████

项目描述: Adult specimen of Phidippus audax also known as a 'jumping spider'. Spider is biologically normal except for the fact that it emits a high pitched repetitive sound similar to a girl laughing manically.  
回收日期: ██-██-20██
回收地点: ██████'s Bedroom in ███, ███████
目前状态: Contained in sound proof terrarium.

项目描述: A piano. Anyone who sits down to play it, will start playing Maple Leaf Rag by Scott Joplin automatically, even if the individual has no piano experience or knowledge of the song. 
回收日期: 3-27-199█
回收地点: Virginia City, Montana
目前状态: In storage at Area-██
Notes: Wait, what song was Dr. ██████ playing on that piano? - Site Director █████

Descriptive: Penny-sized, green, circular. Anomalously causes immediate dying if non-descriptives or non-actives are used in describing.
Recovered: ██-██-20██
Currently: Held securely. Termination requested.

项目描述: Water contained in a plastic case. Water will not turn into steam when boiled, or freeze when exposed to cold temperatures.
回收日期: ██-██-19██
回收地点: Burger King in Los Angeles, California
目前状态: In storage at Area-██

项目描述: A ███████ brand Go-Kart that leaves footprints instead of tyre tracks. Radio will only play the sound of an unidentified male weeping.
回收日期: 09-03-2013
回收地点: A recently abandoned warehouse in ████████, England
目前状态: Held in Site-██'s low-value vehicle garage.

项目描述: A metal fork and spatula. Anyone who observes the fork will refer to it as a small spatula, and anyone who observes the spatula will refer to it as a large fork.
回收日期: 03-09-2017
回收地点: Cedar Springs, Colorado, USA
目前状态: In Site-27's kitchen.

项目描述: A pair of glass cups that cause anything poured in one cup to instead appear in the other one.
回收日期: 03-12-2017
回收地点: █████, ████
目前状态: In Site-██'s low value item storage
Notes: Do not use these for pranks or practical jokes. - Agent D███

项目描述: A piece of ████████ brand notebook paper that reads "Stop making so many fucking infohazards" written in black felt-tip marker. Any subject that looks at it and works for the Foundation will attempt to create many false entries regarding certain infohazards that don't exist in the "Log of Anomalous Items" file.
回收日期: 03-12-2017
回收地点: Created by Dr. Scranton by accident when attempting to make an anomaly with the opposite effect.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A metronome. When turned on by an individual, said individual will sway to the pendulum until it stops. Individuals who do so are unable to recall swaying to the metronome.
回收日期: 09-29-1985
回收地点: Venice, Italy
目前状态: In high value storage of Site-██

Item Define: its a dainosar that meikes yu tak bad ater lookin at it, for 4 hours.
day we pick-up: 12-25-2016
place we pick-up: franse
place it is nau: big space place
Notes: "its rilly bathrin! i do no laik, pliz burn, bad for siensing." smartman guysson

项目描述: A set of thirty-eight green balloons. When blown into, the subjects voice will become a noticeably deeper pitch for a length of time varying on the amount of air blown into one.
回收日期: 04-02-2017
回收地点: England
目前状态: Low level item containment vault at Site-17.

项目描述: The skeleton of an unknown species of the clade Dinosauria that dates back 160 million years. The specimen appears to be bipedal, with two large 3 meter feet on the end of 27 centimeter legs, and a seemingly randomly curved spine. The subject's front limbs have been replaced with apparatuses that function similarly to M1911 handguns, entirely constructed from bone. The limbs only shoot shards of bone in the shape of 9mm handgun bullets, and will not shoot if supplied with any other type of bullet.
回收日期: 9-5-2008
回收地点: An undisclosed dig site in Kansas, USA.
目前状态: In storage at Site-551's Archaeological Wing.

项目描述: A self-refilling 3.8 liter "gallon jug" of milk, which if ingested causes the subject to vomit cheese after a period of 3 to 6 hours, or if they go above 14 meters, and exclaim "I don't remember eating cheese!"
回收日期: 4/30/1986
回收地点: ████████ County Fair, Alabama, USA
目前状态: In refrigerated storage at Site-██

项目描述: An adult Holstein Friesian cow. Any time anybody within earshot of this item says "interrupting cow", they will be interrupted by a loud vocal emission by the cow. 
回收日期: 11/07/2004
回收地点: Kent, UK
目前状态: Died of natural causes in August 2008

项目描述: A 1935 record player that can only play music produced by Danny Goodman.
回收日期: 3/02/2001
回收地点: An antique shop within Florida.
目前状态: In low-level storage.

项目描述: A non-brand three inch by five inch rectangular picture frame with a black plastic exterior. Inside the picture frame is a stock photograph of a Caucasian female and male couple. When viewed directly by any person, they will claim that the person opposite of the viewer's sex was their romantic partner and will make derogatory comments towards the person. Subjects that have different sexual orientations than heterosexual are still affected. If viewed indirectly (i.e. on an electronic device, photograph or mirror) the photo has no anomalous properties. 
回收日期: 12-05-1998
目前状态: Snapped in half by Researcher ████ after being under effect of the photograph. Pieces of the photo and frame still show anomalous properties.
Notes: That [EXPLETIVE] had it coming to him.- Researcher ████

项目描述: An unknown brand chemical toilet (colloquially known as a "Porta-potty"). Analysis of the materials used to construct the item reveals that the structure is approximately 165 million years old. Multiple instances of petrified feces belonging to unknown species of the clade Dinosauria are found within the item's holding tank.
回收日期: 03-28-2017
回收地点: An undisclosed city in Montana, USA.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A Spalding™ basketball that will not miss a shot into a net no matter said defiance of Isaac Newton's Law of Gravity.
回收日期: ██-██-████
回收地点: █████████, ██████, USA
目前状态: Stored in a storage locker at Site 17 for use by allowance from Site Director.

项目描述: A classical sheet music book. Every hour for 10 minutes, music can be heard from the book. Music has been recognized as Beethoven symphonies. 
回收日期: 12-6-2008. 
回收地点: Germany. 
目前状态: In Site-15 storage locker.

项目描述: A bearded dragon that produces a miniature representation of the Aurora Borealis.
回收日期: ██-██-2002
回收地点: ████ ███████, Colorado
目前状态: In animal containment.

项目描述: A head of iceberg lettuce that never rots.
回收日期: ██-██-1999
回收地点: █████, Japan
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: Printer ink cartridge that spontaneously extrudes seawater.
回收日期: 02/24/17
回收地点: Site-██, Dr. Chris "Ox" Moran's Printer
目前状态: In permanent storage.

项目描述: A plastic toy magician's wand.  When held by a human and moved at a speed greater than 5 m/s in any direction, item will emit green sparks from whichever end is not being held.
回收日期: 11-03-2016
回收地点: Bradford, England, United Kingdom
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A fiftyfive-times folded piece of A4 paper which, when fully unfolded, reads the sentence "Humans don't poop twice a day". Upon viewing this, subjects perfectly fold the paper back the same way they unfoldeded it. The response varies from person to person, but most commonly they'll obsessively monitor the defecation patterns of themselves and everyone around them. Effect gradually wears off over a random number of months.
回收日期: 05/05/2001
回收地点: 17th ███████ Street, ██████, China.
目前状态: Site-50's low-security item storage.

项目描述: A .5 m x 1 m mirror which will show the back of its viewer.
回收日期: 06-07-2016
回收地点: Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, United States
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A standard sized ████████ brand chocolate powder container.  Interior dimensions do not correspond to exterior dimensions, extending one meter past top.
回收日期: 02-15-2017
回收地点: Wilmington, Delaware, United States
目前状态: In storage
Notes: On recovery, object contained the amount of powder found in non-anomalous containers, twenty-seven American cents, three Euros, and a human thumb.

项目描述: A sundial that reads the correct time regardless of orientation to the Sun.
回收日期: 03/12/2017
回收地点: Verona, Italy
目前状态: Sitting on Dr. █████'s desk

项目描述: A paperback copy of the novel David Copperfield by Charles Dickens.  Item emits a constant ticking sound despite no apparent mechanism of doing so.
回收日期: 01-05-2013
回收地点: Canberra, Australia
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A bottle of Advil that is seemingly bottomless. It is also impossible to overdose on said pills.
回收日期: 01/06/2012
回收地点: In Dr. █████'s drawers
目前状态: In storage
Notes: Item was found after Dr. █████'s suicide attempt, which failed due to the items properties, Dr. █████ was apprehended and is now put on suicide watch.

项目描述: A generic pink "piggy bank" containing an endless amount of United States Quarter-Dollars. 
回收地点: Fairbanks, Alaska
回收日期::1/22/12
目前状态: In Storage
Notice: Any Staff caught using this device to further their wealth will be severely reprimanded. -Dr. Garbers

项目描述: A grapefruit weighing -100 kilograms. 
回收日期: 4/10/2017. 
回收地点: A supermarket in Baltimore, MD. 
目前状态: Consumed by Agent Joseph. Agent reprimanded. 
I lost weight after eating that thing! -Agent Joseph.

项目描述: An article on popular encyclopedia website █████████.org which contains a line of text describing I, SCP-426, in the third person.
回收日期: 30/1/2015
回收地点: Website █████████.org
目前状态: On website █████████.org. Article edited to mislead readers into believing that the SCP Foundation is a fictional community of fantasy writers.

项目描述: Approximately 30 m of copper wire.  When connected to a power source, the current in the wire measures at a constant 50 amps, regardless of the voltage of the power source.
回收日期: 06-17-2014
回收地点:  █████████ High School, Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
目前状态: In storage at Site-15

项目描述: A VHS tape that plays a random set of cartoons dating from 19██ to 2017. Viewers describe different cartoons from other viewers present. Displays no footage when viewed from a camera.
回收日期: 05-24-2015
回收地点: █████, New York
目前状态: In storage at Site-19.

项目描述: An indescribable statue.
回收日期: 
回收地点: 
目前状态:

项目描述: A Honda Civic, which contains a third heat setting on the seat warmer switch. If the seat warmer switch is "balanced" in the middle for at least 0.6 seconds, the exterior of the car radiates at approximately 2700 degrees Celsius.
回收日期: 08-16-16
回收地点: ████████, Missouri
目前状态: In storage
Note: This anomaly was brought to the attention of the foundation after the newspaper ████ ██████ ███████ wrote a short story about a "Car that melted road blocking protesters alive in ████████"

项目描述: A young Guatemalan female between the ages of █ and ██ that has the lower body of a Thomson's gazelle.
回收日期: 10-12-2001
回收地点: Cobán, Guatemala
目前状态: Humanely terminated upon request.

项目描述: A chair, 1.5 m tall and 0.9 m wide, which exists in only two dimensions.  Item is invisible from any side besides the front and back.  However, it is still possible to use item as a normal chair.
回收日期: 08-17-2010
回收地点: Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A cloth bag, similar to that of a seeing eye glasses holder. Object can hold any three(3) items, regardless of size.
回收日期: 12-12-2012
回收地点: Miami, Florida
目前状态: Used by Agent ██████ during missions.

项目描述: A piece of tape that repels any surface the "sticky" side approaches during attempted use.
回收日期: 03-02-2005
回收地点: Salt Lake City, Utah
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A wooden nutcracker in the shape of Joseph Stalin. It will only break nuts if someone who lived in the former East Germany uses it.
回收日期: 11-9-1989
回收地点: Berlin, Germany
目前状态: In storage at Site-██.

项目描述: A standard-sized (92 x 57 x 203 mm) brick.  One side of item (arbitrarily designated the top) constantly displays the 1951 British-American film The African Queen, in its entirety and on endless loop.
回收日期: 4-27-2004
回收地点: Cape Town, South Africa
目前状态: In storage

项目描述: A strain of H3N2 influenza that causes dreams of stringed instruments in infected subjects. Dreams typically relate to the presence of microscopic instruments in the blood and lungs.
回收日期: ██-██-████
回收地点: ████████, ███████.
目前状态: Endemic to the ████████ region. Containment efforts are ongoing.

项目描述: A standard █-lb bowling ball. Anyone who uses it while bowling will invariably get a strike. 
回收日期: 04/21/2017. 
回收地点: ████ ███████ bowling alley of ████████, ██, USA. 
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: An oversized analogue clock. Whenever the clock is recalled, the individual is reminded that it's time to stop.
回收日期: 26/04/2017.
回收地点: Household store in Brisbane, Australia.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A navy blue ██████-brand hoody.  When used to clean the lenses of glasses, monocles, or other eyewear, the item removes approximately 99.9% of noticeable smudges, scratches, and microbial life.  Subjects who use the item report their eyewear as being "crystal clear" immediately following use.
Date of Recovery: ██-██-2017
Location of Recovery: ████████, Virginia
目前状态: Hung on a coat rack in the break room of Site-██ for general use.

项目描述: A standard asthma inhaler containing a ████████-brand aluminium container. Upon inhaling the contents of the inhaler, the users bronchioles seize up in a manner analogous to an asthma attack. These symptoms cease after approximately 5 minutes.
Date of Recovery: ██-██-2009
Location of Recovery: ██ █████████ Hospital, Sydney
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A VHS tape labeled "Jack Nicholson Wearing Less Than One Shirt". Subjects who view the contents of the tape become unable to perceive more than 50% of any object at a time unless applied amnestic treatment.
回收日期: 05-02-2017
回收地点: Cedar Springs, Colorado
目前状态: In a storage locker in Site-27.

项目描述: A fully functioning 1:100 scale replica of a Colnago Arabesque bicycle. Despite the object's size, it possesses the same velocity and acceleration capabilities as a regular Arabesque.
回收日期: ██-██-2016
回收地点: Nagano, Japan
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述:  A standard iPhone 5-7 charger and plug that when inserted into any iPhone of model 5-7 will charge the phone instantly. This does not work if other plugs or chargers are used.
回收日期: 5/6/17 
回收地点: Tampa, Florida
目前状态: In Site-19s break room for general use.

项目描述:  A standard NERF dart gun with lazer sight attachment that, when fired, acts as a regular 9 millimeter handgun. Fires Nerf darts at the same velocity as a regular 9 millimeter round and the same force and lethality as expected from a projectile of this speed. 
回收日期: 3/4/10
回收地点: Evidence Locker in ██████████ ███ Australia
目前状态: In Dr Rhodes office in case of emergency 
Note: Funniest. Death. Ever. - Dr Rhodes in light of incident 1456-A

项目描述: A bus stand located that causes all buses with the stand as their destination to arrive 10 minutes later than scheduled, by causing a series of apparently unrelated accidents to delay the bus's arrival.
回收日期: 05/09/16
回收地点: Mascot, Sydney, Australia
目前状态: Contained by ensuring all buses that use the stand arrive at 10-minute intervals.

项目描述: An olive-green metal cube that will turn into plastic and melt unless referred to as "Olivia." If referred to as "Olivia", it will revert back into a metal cube.
回收日期:6/1/1993
回收地点: Alhambra, California, USA
目前状态: In storage
Note: The plastic is thermosetting plastic.

项目描述: A standard, non-anomalous white deck chair. It is devoid of any anomalous properties other than its location of recovery.
回收日期: N/A
回收地点: The surface of Europa, the moon of Saturn
目前状态: Remains on the surface of Europa due to cost of extraction.

项目描述: A Studio-Grade light. When shone on an object, the object's shadow points towards the light.
回收日期: 5/16/2004
回收地点: Austin, Texas
目前状态: In Site-19's break room, used for entertainment.

项目描述: A pair of glasses. When worn, the user will notice objects or persons within eyesight will appear or disappear.
回收日期: 5/9/2014
回收地点: Columbia, South Carolina. 
目前状态: Storage Room on Site 18.

项目描述: A statue of Cupid that, when touched, will render the subject fertile.
回收日期: 2/14/█████
回收地点: ████, █████
目前状态: Storage Room on Site ██

项目描述: A fireproof 8.5 x 11 piece of paper that sprays water whenever placed near extreme heat or fire. 
回收日期: 3/2/2017.
回收地点: Baltimore, MD. 
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A waste basket that causes all objects thrown towards it to bounce off of the side.
回收日期: 2/18/2013
回收地点: Site 19 break room.
目前状态: Site 19 break room.

项目描述: A bottle that, no matter the contents, when flipped will always land on its head.
回收日期: 9/12/2016
回收地点: ███████ High School vending machine
目前状态: Used as a gimmick to impress new agents accepted into the Foundation.
Can Dr. Malchozky please return the item to the front desk of Site-46? Professor Yang would like his turn now.

项目描述: A severed human hand that provides good luck and fortune to anyone who possesses it.
回收日期: 31/5/2017
回收地点: Found in SCP-████'s chamber after D-class failed to properly follow containment procedures.
目前状态: In an air tight glass container in break room of Site-27 to remind personnel that containment procedures must be followed. Also believed to provide some sort of morale boost to anyone in the presence of the item.

项目描述: A block of clay that never dries up. 
回收日期: 5/10/2017. 
回收地点: Sacremento, CA. 
目前状态: In Site-19 storage locker.

Itm Descepyion: A standad QWEERTY keubiard thst caydes anuome uding iy ti maje typis, np maytee hiw cartful thy ar. 
Dats od Recivery: 09/09/2009. 
Licstion od Recivery: Atlanya, Gorgia. 
Cureent Ststus: Ib Stoage.

项目描述: A .55 calibre bullet with the date of manufacture as 8/2/1898. The bullet was carbon dated back to 1898 being the only of it's kind created back then. The bullet can be fired an innumerous amount of times.
回收日期: 12/8/2017
回收地点: ███████, China.
目前状态: Used in target practise against heavily armoured targets.

项目描述: A █████ bucket of cyan blue house paint which turns lime green when applied to any surface.
回收日期: 01/24/2017
回收地点: ██████, Canada.
目前状态: Approximately 85% of bucket depleted post testing, currently in Storage.

项目描述: A white glass plate seven inches in diameter where anything eaten from it is given a strong taste of salt, even if it did not contain any.
回收日期: 7/3/2009
回收地点: █████, France.
目前状态: In Storage.

项目描述: A loaf of █████ brand wheat bread. Whenever a slice is taken from it, it will regenerate once out of direct eyesight.
回收日期: 4/23/20██
回收地点: Super-Shop market, █████, Rhode Island, USA.
目前状态: Site-19 cafeteria.

项目描述: An unremarkable Bayliner Cierra Boat that attracts blood towards itself.
回收日期: 2/24/20██
回收地点: Guangxi, China.
目前状态: In Storage.

项目描述: A pair of macro-quantum entangled Jenga sets.
回收日期: ██-██-20██
回收地点: ███████ ████, ███ ████
目前状态: In storage; Site 15 Breakroom, Site 17 Breakroom

项目描述: A copy of Leonardo Da Vinci's Mona Lisa, painted by an unknown artist. When looked at, the eyes of the woman in the painting appear to staring at whoever is looking at it. Multiple people in the room report that each person appears to be stared at simultaneously.
回收日期: ██-██-2017
回收地点: A yard sale in ██████, New Jersey.
目前状态: Hanging on the wall in a hallway at Site-19 for aesthetic purposes.

项目描述: A 3-year old female golden retriever dog, named Peachy, that meows and purrs like a cat instead of barking. Has 7 toes on each paw instead of the usual 4.
回收日期: 2-28-2017
回收地点: █████████ Animal Shelter, █████, Texas
目前状态: Site-19 psychiatric office, currently owned by Dr. █████ as a therapy dog for her patients.

项目描述: A flat-headed screwdriver. Anyone who looks at it is convinced that it is a Philips-head screwdriver until they look away from it.
回收日期: 1-23-2010
回收地点: █████'s Home Improvement Retail, Topeka, Kansas.
目前状态: Site 15; In storage.
Note: You will not be able to use this properly due to its neurological effects. Quit taking it from storage when you lose your own screwdriver! -Dr. Grant

项目描述: A Chinese-made AMR-2 anti-material rifle. When fired while loaded with ammunition, a red flag with the word "BANG" in uppercase letters will eject from the barrel. One round in the magazine will disappear after each "shot". "BANG" will always be written in the first language of the person who fired the shot.
回收日期: █-█-2017
回收地点: █████, China
目前状态: Site-19, in storage; available for personnel to use at the Site-19 firing range upon request.

项目描述: A fishing rod that will always hook a fish regardless of what water the hook was cast in.
回收日期: 12-3-2015
回收地点: Ocean City, Maryland
目前状态: In storage.
Note: Dr. ██████ reeled a 9-foot catfish out of a cup of lemon juice with this. I wouldn't have believed it if I wasn't there to see it myself. -Agent ████

项目描述: A piece of paper that show stylized logo of various GoI in purple ink, logo and style changing every three months.  
回收日期: 12/30/2016  
回收地点: [REDACTED]  
目前状态: Framed in Site-88 hallway.

项目描述: An indestructible █████ brand camera tripod. Human beings approaching this object develop an urge to physically assault the item until they are exhausted. Additionally, any electronic devices possessing speakers brought within 5 meters of the object will spontaneously begin to play Megadeth's "Tornado of Souls" at ██dB, regardless of whether or not the device is charged.
回收日期: 5 May 2017
回收地点: ████'s Camera Shop, ██████, Arizona.
目前状态: Kept for recreational purposes in Site-45.

项目描述: A standard Honeywell™️ thermostat. Adjusting the temperature instantly changes the temperature of the room it's in, with seemingly no limit.
回收日期: 6 June 2017
回收地点: ███████████, Ohio.
目前状态: In storage at Site-19.

项目描述: A 10 cm tall Magic 8 Ball toy that is cube-shaped and covered in dots patterned after a standard six-sided die. Its answers appear on the four-dot side, within the dot in the corner where the six-dot and two-dot sides meet. Anyone who has the object on their person develops limited precognition while in possession of the toy. Subjects have likened the ability to "Spidey-sense".
回收日期: 12 August 2013
回收地点: A day care in ███████, California.
目前状态: Destroyed after being knocked off a railing and cracking open on a junior researcher's head. The 20-sided answer die previously encased in the toy was reported to have dissolved upon exposure to air. The junior researcher developed a moderate concussion.

项目描述: A 1 foot long piece of wood, with the letters "THE ESSENCE OF DESTRUCTION" painted on with human blood. this wood made any person viewing it scream violently and scratch at their eyes and [REDACTED].
回收日期: 10 march 2017
回收地点: A cabin in northern Ireland.
目前状态: contained in a locked metal box at site-█. DNA tests have confirmed the person the blood came from has been killed, and the murderer caught.
Note: this Object is currently under investigation to determine whether object is to be designated as an SCP

项目描述: An elevator cab. Any acceleration the cab experiences is directly applied to all contents of the cab; this acceleration is thus undetectable from the cab's interior.
回收日期: ██-██-20██
回收地点: ███████, Beijing.
目前状态: Under study at Site-██.

项目描述: A REALLY COOL ROCK! I MEAN THIS IS ONE OF THE MOST AWESOME ROCKS I HAVE EVER SEEN! IN FACT IT IS THE COOLEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN! Item is in fact a small rock that when someone touches or picks up believes the rock to be the “coolest” thing ever. This is still in effect after the person stops touching it. Other than this it seems to be a normal rock.
回收日期: ██-██-████
回收地点: Was found by Dr.███████ while studying SCP-████, after some study it was found to not be connected to SCP-████.
目前状态: ON THE RADDEST DESK OF THE AMAZING DR.███████, BECAUSE HE FOUND IT AND THEREFORE IS THE COOLEST PERSON!

项目描述: A number of common handkerchiefs which, when placed inside one's trousers' pocket will rid the subject of cold, flu, and symptoms of rhinitis.
回收日期: 19-05-1996
回收地点: Was found in Tavor, Czech Republic, after half of the town recovered from the early onsets of an outbreak of pneumonia.
目前状态: Conserved in a locker at Site-██, since extended medical research has been deemed not cost-effective for the Foundation.

项目描述: A case for an ███████ model phone. When applied to the phone of the appropriate model, the screen will become intensely sensitive to any form of contact. As much as a small drag of a fingernail along the phone, top to bottom, could cause major damage to both the screen and the internals.
回收日期: 10-04-201█
回收地点: ████████, Virginia.
目前状态: In storage.
Notes: The removal process almost put a hole completely through the phone… I better not see this case on anyone's phone around here, consensual or not. - Dr. ██████

项目描述: An average USB flash drive that, when attempts are made to insert it into a computer, will always be inverted as to prevent itself from being plugged in.
回收日期: 12-09-201█
回收地点: ███████ County Library, Florida
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: The website, "whatwouldhappenifiwasshot.███". When accessed, it generates an accurate 3D model of the user, which can then be "shot" by clicking on any part of the body.
回收日期: 07-01-2017
回收地点: N/A. Discovered following a Reddit post on the "todayilearned" sub-forum.
目前状态: Domain blocked from all major internet service providers.

项目描述: A rubber ball, 5 cm in diameter, that slowly rolls toward the closest living human. Running it through a metal detector showed no signs of electronic parts.
回收日期: 07-02-2017
回收地点: The break room, rolling around the feet of annoyed personnel.
目前状态: In a small glass container, duct taped to Dr. ████'s desk.

项目描述: 30 black baseball hats. When a human puts on one of the hats, The logo of their least favorite Major League Baseball (MLB) team will appear on the front. If the wearer does not possess any knowledge of the MLB, the hat will remain blank.
回收日期: 07-██-2017
回收地点: ██████, New York, USA
目前状态: One hat was incinerated, no anomalous properties found in remains. The other 29 hats are in the Site-19 lounge.
Notes: Why does no one here know about the MLB? - Dr. ████

项目描述: A jar that self refills itself with cherry licorice everytime it becomes empty.
回收日期: 12-25-20██
回收地点: Site-██, Guam.
目前状态: Sitting on the desk of Dr. Spitfire, and oftenly brought everywhere he goes.
Notes: Why do I like Cherry Licorice so much? - Dr. Spitfire

项目描述: A mouse pad that renders any computer mouse useless.
回收日期: 1-15-20██
回收地点: Stock Exchange Office, New York
目前状态: In storage.
Notes: No matter how funny you think it would be, do not replace another researcher's mouse pad with this. - Dr. ██████

项目描述: A pack of 12 simple plastic ballpoint pen that whenever someone picks one up will remark in English “Wow this thing must weigh 500 pounds.” Saying so even if they don’t know English or use the imperial system. “Mr. USA - Anartist” is printed on every pen.
回收日期: 7-13-2006
回收地点: The house of a known anartist in Graz, Austria
目前状态: Site-77 Storage

项目描述: A sewer grate that appears to be invisible in any photo taken on a digital camera.
回收日期: 8-10-2017
回收地点: Kyoto, Japan
目前状态: Under surveillance

项目描述: A nuclear warhead that constantly plays dubstep. The songs are original to the warhead and played at 95 dB.
回收日期: 5-24-2011
回收地点: [CLASSIFIED IN CONJUNCTION WITH UNITED KINGDOM AUTHORITIES]
目前状态: Installed as Site-25 on-site nuclear safeguard
Note: Before containment, a number of songs produced were released online crediting "DJ Dirty Nuke" as their creator. We would like to speak with whoever is responsible for their release, but the songs themselves need no containment. - Dr. Wall

项目描述: A grey suitcase. Results of X-ray imaging will indicate that illegal contraband exist within its conpartments, despite any not physically existing.
回收日期: ██/██/2017
回收地点: █████████ , Canada
目前状态: In storage within Site-███.

项目描述: A small grey blanket with red and blue stripes. Despite the soft appearance, it feels like standard issue sandpaper.
回收日期: 5-2-2014
回收地点:██████, Canada
目前状态: Inside the office of Dr. Quinton In Site-73 storage.
Notes: D-7295 used this as a weapon to injure several researchers during low-level containment breach, requesting to move item to Site-73 storage. - Dr. Quinton

项目描述: A standard dinner fork that when used will cause whatever it has been stabbed into to change into medium rare cooked steak.
回收日期: 7/26/17
回收地点: Tampa, Florida
目前状态: In Area-108 standard storage locker.
Notes: During a low-level containment breach caused by the Chaos Insurgency, item was taken out of containment by an escaped Class-D and used on several agents. Class-D was terminated and item returned to storage.

项目描述: An acoustic guitar that will play any song, with vocals in Kurt Donald Cobain's voice.
回收日期: 4/5/94
回收地点: Seattle, Washington
目前状态: Currently in Dr. Brim's possession.
Notes: I'll be taking this to my office and keeping it secure, at least someone will enjoy the present he left us all. -Dr. Brim

项目描述: A youtube video made by the youtuber PopularMMOs PatVsTheWorld.  When described in any sense, it will cause all text written about it to turn white.
回收日期:9/30/17
回收地点:N/A
目前状态:Deleted.
Damn. -Pat █████

项目描述: A Teapot orbiting the sun.
回收日期: 03-09-2003
回收地点: Detected by the Foundation's Space Telescope  ██████ for observing astronomical anomalies at coordinates  + ██°  ██'  ██''  at █.██ au of distance from Earth.
目前状态: All non-foundation telescopes with capabilities of detecting the teapot are to be monitored. If the object is detected, all data about it should be deleted and class-A amnestics should be administrated to non-foundation civilians who observed the object.
Note: Sending a space mission to recover the object was deemed too costly and has been denied by the order of O5-█.

项目描述: A self-containing spatial-temporal paradox. Indescribable appearance.
回收日期: All the time
回收地点: Everywhere
目前状态: Not in containment, located in a standard locker.
Notes: I don't know what or when this thing is, but I think it isn't now. - Dr. Javlin

项目描述: A twelve-inch ruler that changes the length of whatever object it is measuring to exactly twelve inches. All other measurements of said object are changed proportionally.
回收日期: █/██/15
回收地点:████████ Middle School, ███████, Oregon
目前状态: Currently in Dr. Bright's possession In storage.
Notes: Please be advised that any researchers attempting to use this item to manipulate the length of a certain bodily extremity will be reassigned and severely reprimanded. Seriously, Bright. You're going to hurt yourself. - Dr. Brim

项目描述: Pots of paint, the pigment of which only visually stimulates the cone cells in the eye. This effect causes it to appear constantly dimly lit, and to become grey when viewed from any direction other than head-on. Further effects include headaches and eye-ache, after prolonged exposure.
回收日期: 29/3/2017
回收地点: █████, ████████
目前状态: Research is underway on utilising this AO as camouflage, and on synthesising larger amounts of the pigment. SCP-294 to be used for this purpose when free.  
Notes: Interesting, this one. Somehow, the effect also works when the pigment is viewed through a photo. I've no idea how. - Dr. Hagemeister

项目描述: A CD with the song "Up in the Sky" by english rock band Oasis. When the line "before you start falling" plays, any objects not touching the ground in a 6 meter circle around the source of the music will immediately fall to the ground at a speed of 5.4 m/s. This effect extends to the end of the atmosphere.
回收日期: 7/6/2017
回收地点: Creation Records warehouse, █████, ██
目前状态: In storage, accessible if needed to recontain flying SCPs.

项目描述: An otherwise unknown subspecies of Pinus pumila (Siberian dwarf pine).  The wood of this species functions as a superconducter, with a resistance of practically zero.  
回收日期: 9-13-1992
回收地点: [REDACTED], Siberia
目前状态: Due to the species' isolated location and low population, only minimal containment is necessary.  Currently, Outpost-18 of Site-███ has been set up to monitor the only known population.

项目描述: An ornate vase, which, when observed, slightly corrupts any medium containing information about it (This effect extends to memory). Scale of corruption is proportional with duration of viewing.
回收日期: 15/11/2000
回收地点: █████, ████████
目前状态: Currently in storage, in an opaque box.  
Notes: At least twenty copies of this text are to be kept at all times. On the off chance that the vase is viewed, we can piece together the entry from the fragments of each copy.- Dr. Hagemeister

项目描述: A "Myst" book. Any human who touches the picture is teleported into a personal instance of an environment faithfully recreating the 1993 adventure game. Appearance of teleportation is consistent with the game's "linking" effect. Achieving any of the endings "links" the subject to the New Mexico Desert. Entering multiple times does not maintain memory of previous visits.
回收日期: ██-██-████
回收地点: New Mexico Desert
目前状态: In storage. Cyan Worlds denies knowledge of item.
Notes: As a lifelong fan of the series, I'm impressed by how thorough "Atrus's" knowledge of the lore is, when I can actually get him to take a break from his writing.~Dr █████

项目描述: A WWII encyclopedia, the name of the author is not present on the cover. When a person touches the object, they will experience Adolf Hitlers life through a first-person view. This experience will reportedly end when they die. Subjects describe the experience as interesting, yet somewhat traumatizing.
回收日期: ██-█-████
回收地点: █████, Germany
目前状态: Incinerated
Notes: This is one of this objects that just makes me say; "How was this created?" It makes me contemplate life, and honestly, I was sad to hear it was going to be destroyed. - Doctor █████

项目描述: A small wooden cup that is instantly filled with sulfuric acid if anyone within a 2 meter radius pronounces the words "Phillip is coming over from Spain." The cup does not seem to suffer any modifications by the substance.
回收日期: ██-█-████
回收地点: ██████, Portugal
目前状态: In storage within Site ██.
Notes: Following a series of incidents regarding our fellow colleague Phillip's transfer from Spanish site ██ and a significant amount of acid burns, of no one is to be allowed access to the wooden cup without explicit clearance from myself. - Dr. ███████

项目描述: A red cape that causes any subject wearing it to believe that they have superpowers and must use them to save the world. Note that the cape does not provide any superpowers.
回收日期: 05-04-████
回收地点: Carl's Cool Comics in ████████, Minnesota
目前状态: In Site 34 secure storage.

项目描述: A seven-day pill organizer. When prescription medication is removed from one of its compartments and consumed, there is a ~30% chance that identical medication will spontaneously appear in that compartment several hours later.
回收日期: 2017-07-05
回收地点: Estate sale in ███████, Argentina
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A standard [REDACTED]. Any descriptions of the appearance of the [REDACTED] are redacted by unknown means. 
回收日期: 15/11/2017
回收地点: A garage sale in ██████, Wisconsin
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A bag of 50 Zip-Ties. The Zip-ties are indestructible and stain proof.
回收日期: 8/23/2017
回收地点: Dr.████'s desk's bottom left drawer
目前状态: In storage awaiting verification to be classified as an SCP. 
Notes: Dr.████████ insists on classifying the anomalous object as an SCP despite its harmless properties. Dr.████ (who came in contact with the anomalous item) claims that "They could jeopardize the entire foundation". Dr.████ has received medical treatment for paranoia but still persists in wanting to keep the object contained.

项目描述: A Samson brand smart phone, capable of being used indefinitely without the need for charging.
回收日期: 4/5/2017
回收地点: Taken  from cell block a from A d class holding at Site:██
目前状态: Missing from containment as of 8/24/2017, shortly before Dr Robert obtained a new phone, investigation into the where abouts of Robert and the phone is ongoing.
Notes: If anyone finds Dr Robert him and his cellphone are to be brought to me Dr.███

ʇɥƃᴉɹq ˙ɹp - ¿ʞɔɐq ʇᴉ ǝʌɐɥ I uɐƆ :sǝʇoN
˙ǝƃɐɹoʇs uI :snʇɐʇS ʇuǝɹɹnƆ
ǝɔᴉɟɟo s,ʇɥƃᴉɹq ˙ɹp ǝpᴉsuI :ʎɹǝʌoɔǝɹ ɟo uoᴉʇɐɔo˥
████-██-██ :ʎɹǝʌoɔǝɹ ɟo ǝʇɐp
uʍop ǝpᴉsdn ʇᴉ sǝqᴉɹɔsǝp ʇɐɥʇ ʇxǝʇ llɐ sǝʞɐɯ ʇɐɥʇ xoq ∀ :uoᴉʇdᴉɹɔsǝp ɯǝʇI

项目描述: A slab of concrete engraved with the words: "Please step here on █/██/████ to prevent the apocalypse". The item itself currently posseses a hume reading of ██.█ but has no apparent effects on outside reality.
回收日期: 3/05/2005
回收地点: Taken from a sidewalk in █████ Texas.
目前状态: In storage. Plans for testing of the item on █/██/████ have been approved.

项目描述: A CD containing a copy of Elvis Nightmare, which inexplicably makes users who play it travel to the nearest temple and undergo a year of religious fulfillment. 
回收日期: 05/08/2014
回收地点: CD recovered from the bedroom of a Vatican Priest.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A fork, composed of plastic made to look like polished metal. There is nothing strange or special about this fork. I promise, it's normal! In fact, if you could, please ignore this fork. There is literally nothing special, weird, or strange about it. Just walk away. Do it. DO IT.
回收日期: 6/17/2017
回收地点: Dr ████s office.
目前状态: In storage.
Notes: Jesus fucking Christ, this thing gave me night terrors for a month. Don't believe what it tells you; it's a fucking eldritch horror summoned from god-knows-where.

项目描述: A piece of paper. Descriptions of the item will transform the texts medium into paper. Individuals witnessing the resulting effect from this item will feel a strong urge to support the item, usually by compliments.
回收日期: 5/3/2017
回收地点: Site-█s main entrance zone.
目前状态: In storage.
Notes: God, this data looks AMAZING. What kind of paper did you use? I love it!

项目描述: A copy of the novel, "The Bad Beginning", by Lemony Snicket. When the novel is opened to page 13, a man can be heard singing the words, "Look Away". This man has been identified as the actor, Neil Patrick Harris.
回收日期: 9/2/2017
回收地点: Capac State Library
目前状态: In storage.
Notes: Personnel are not allowed to take the book out of storage to read it. If you want to read a book, read the employee handbook.

项目描述: A Carl Thompson Rainbow Bass. When any song of the band Primus is played, a voice is heard saying "Primus Sucks!". This effect is present regardless of whether the song was played perfectly or incomplete.
回收日期: 05/02/2006
回收地点: A music store in ██████.
目前状态: In storage.
Notes: Primus Sucks!

项目描述: A portable AM/FM radio that receives stations from Rhode Island instead of its current location. Stations from neighboring areas of Connecticut and Massachusetts are also audible, gradually fading the further their transmitters are from central Providence.
回收日期: 09/06/2017
回收地点: Offices of ████████, Inc., Los Angeles, CA.
目前状态: In storage.

项目描述: A large bathroom mirror. anyone who looks into the mirror has a strong urge to have a staring contest with their own reflection. This urge subsides once the individual blinks. 
回收日期: 09/09/2017
回收地点: A pawn shop in ███████ Texas.
目前状态: In storage.
Notes: A cloth should be kept over the mirror to prevent the anomalous property.

Informazioni Sull'oggetto: Una ciotola di spaghetti che quando hanno visto modifiche tutte le informazioni digitate o scritto su di esso in Italiano mal formulata.
Giorno di ottenere tale oggetto: 03/01/2017
Piastra di recupero: ████, Americani Uniti Territory.
Corrente: mangiato.

项目描述: A fluorescent light strip that emits "dark" when powered with no less than 22.3 watts. "Dark" behaves as an anti-light particle would: opaque objects leave "light" shadows, should there be other lighting in the room, mirrors reflect "dark" as expected, etc.
回收日期: █/12/198█
回收地点: Basement of small Italian restaurant "█████ ██ ███"
目前状态: Site ███ recreational wing
There's no reason to keep an anti-light locked up. I think it's a pretty interesting mind screw. -Researcher █████████

项目描述: A pair of red training boxing gloves which, despite fully covering the fingers, do not impede finger function in any significant way.
回收日期: 12/06/1999
Location of Recovery: A garage sale in Decatur, Georgia.
目前状态: In storage. Research into possible connection with [REDACTED] is ongoing.

项目描述: Thirteen Russian Matryoshka that all mutually fit inside of each other.
回收日期: 2/10/1923
回收地点: ██ kilometers Northeast of Moscow, Russia.
目前状态: 2 shattered by reckless researcher (reprimanded. Remains show no anomalous properties), 11on display in Site ██ Anomalous Items wing.

项目描述: A blue backpack. When this backpack comes into contact with a human, its weight increases by approx. 836.7 pounds. After ten minutes of contact, the weight of the backpack will slowly increase. The backpack is currently 6002.18 kg.
回收日期: 18/6/2017
回收地点: A community elementary school in █████, Ohio.
目前状态: In process of being transported to Site-███.
Notes: By god, the recovery team still hasn't gotten it to the site. They've been hauling that thing from █████ to here for the past year now. Turns out automated contact still counts. — Junior Researcher ██

项目描述: A black and white cathode ray television set manufactured in the 1950s. When switched on, regardless of channel setting, a young man in a cricket player's uniform is seen looking directly at the viewer and continually repeating the phrase "the man upstairs" in a variety of inflections and intonations.
回收日期: 3/3/1998
回收地点: Purchased from an antique dealer in Vladivostok, Russia.
目前状态: Unplugged and in storage.

项目描述: A HSS Fender Stratocaster with a Floyd Rose. The guitar's strings will never go out of tune, break, degrade overtime, will always remain at the same constant tension, regardless of events that would alter the tension, and will never lose its tonality.
回收日期: █/█/1980
回收地点: A Guitar Center store in █████████, U.S.A.
目前状态: In storage at the Music Wing of Site-██. Currently tuned to D#0 tuning.
Notes: Personnel who attempt to play the guitar in bass range tunings with guitar amps will be reprimanded.
Additional Notes: No, it does not djent.

项目描述: I'm a rubber ducky! :3 I can squeak, talk, and float! :D <3
回收日期: Who cares! Who wants to snuggle? ;)
Location: I was from… oh, God…
目前状态: … Well, heh, looks like… w-was dad really like that?

… I need to go lie down…

*wimper*

项目描述: A file named imagene.exe. When run, it allows for the selection of text within images.
回收日期: 6/18/2014
回收地点: Albany, New York
目前状态: Stored on a flash drive at Site-██.

项目描述: An audio file named Bells.mp3. It plays a random song played on bells each time it is opened. Upon listening to the audio clip in its entirety, the viewer will hear that exact song heard in the clip every time a bell rings within the area it is audible to the subject. This only affects the viewer, and lasts for an indefinite amount of time unless an amnesiac is administered or the subject is rendered deaf. 
回收日期: 4/3/2016
回收地点: Recovered from a laptop in London, England
目前状态: Stored on a computer at Site-█.
Notes: Personnel who change their colleague's ringtones to the .mp3 file outside testing purposes will be reprimanded.

项目描述: A PNG file of a pair of human lungs that causes anyone who views anything related to it to forcibly breathe manually, sneeze and cough for █ hours. The effects may vary, but do not accumulate.
回收日期: [REDACTED]
回收地点: The computer of various citizens in ██████ city, Brazil.
目前状态: Stored on a computer as 
Notes: Personnel who prank others with this will be seriously reprimanded.

项目描述: Bookmarks that will not lose their place.
回收日期: 10/5/2017
回收地点: Franford Library, Arkansas 
目前状态: All 3872 instances of this item are available in the staff library

项目描述: a pair of scissors that "regenerates" paper. Two scissor blades that "regenerate" paper.
回收日期: 10/5/2017
回收地点: ██████ elementary school.
目前状态: Available for staff use. Snapped in half after being stepped on by researcher ████, still available for staff use.

项目描述: A soda can.  Analysis indicates that the ratio of the circumference of its bases to the diameter of its bases (i.e., the value of pi) is roughly equal to 4.282983.
回收日期: 2017-09-19
回收地点: Nishinomiya, Hyōgo Prefecture, Japan
目前状态: In storage

.desrever eb ot ti tuoba nettirw txet fo senil yna sesuac hcihw drazahofni roniM :noitpircseD metI
7-01-7102 :yrevoceR fo etaD
 ]DETCADER[ :yrevoceR fo noitacoL
egarots nI :sutatS tnerruC
Notes: Maybe I should have written that in reverse.

项目描述: A gold wedding ring. Item is noticed to shine 87.5% brighter than other objects built from the same alloy.
回收日期: 2017-10-02
回收地点: ██████ Jewelry Store, Italy.
目前状态: Worn by researcher Dr. Rivers, subject describes item as "really pretty".

项目描述: A Alienware laptop. Noticed to have a "infinite" storage space. Number of space reads "Infinite
回收日期:2017-10-12
回收地点:Raid on a said Insurgent holdout, found in the holdout armory
目前状态: In possession of Dr. Church in his personal quarters
Notes: Whoever put ████ ███████ of pornography on my new computer is gonna get a [DATA EXPUNGED] and a lower paycheck!- Dr. Church

项目描述: A female researcher of ██ age, that will always sneeze whenever in direct sight with any Keter Class object.
回收日期: 20██-█-█
回收地点: Ability found during testing at Site-19
Current Statues: Stationed at Site-19
Notes: I don't care I've been put in the anomalous category, I'm don't always sneeze when in direct contact with a Keter!- Dr. Catherine
Notes(2): After further testing, we have confirmed that Catherine sneezes when in direct contact with any Anomalies.- Dr. Church

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